“Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you. Greet one another with a holy kiss. All God’s people here send their greetings. May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.”
2 Corinthians 13:11-14 NIVUK
A kiss amongst Christians is unfortunately a problem in our Western societies, or at least in the UK, because it can be misconstrued or misinterpreted due to the societal views and taboos that exist. It can be just about considered acceptable between a man and a woman who know each other, but when observed between those of the same sex, the fault line exposed by an onlooker’s views on gender issues rises up and can cause problems. Not all the time, of course, because multi-cultural Britain has come to understand and accept customs appropriate to certain people groups and religions. But in our traditional churches and denominations, the holy kiss does not appear in the liturgies or even in more social settings. In fact, in some churches with larger congregations, any form of greeting can be missing. It can be easy to slip into the meeting after it has started and slip out without talking to anyone, let alone give someone a handshake, hug or even a kiss.
But things were different in those early Christian days, when Paul and the other Apostles were turning the Mediterranean societies upside down with their message of the love and forgiveness of God and of Christ crucified for their sins. In those days, a holy kiss was a non-sexual, sincere greeting of brotherly affection, unity, and love amongst the early believers, signifying a “set apart” spiritual family bond. A kiss was an acceptable form of greeting among people in the Middle East and was even a cultural norm, used to greet guests or family members. It was even a common greeting showing respect to those in authority or when reconciliation was required between two parties. But what set the Christian holy kiss apart from the secular equivalent was that it was “holy” and had a deeper spiritual meaning for early believers, particularly as it crossed racial and cultural boundaries.
So, in a setting where there were different factions, as was the case in Corinth, Paul’s encouragement to “Greet one another with a holy kiss” would have been a sign that any differences had been settled and unity between believers was again present. This he followed up with his final words, “may … the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all”. Such fellowship was not possible in an atmosphere of antagonism, disunity and chaos.
Paul encouraged the believers in Rome to do the same, as we read in Romans 16:16, “Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ send greetings”. It must have been standard text for Paul, being word-for-word the same as in 2 Corinthians 13. Again, the greeting appears in 1 Corinthians 16:20, “All the brothers and sisters here send you greetings. Greet one another with a holy kiss”, and 1 Thessalonians 5:26, “Greet all God’s people with a holy kiss”. But it wasn’t just Paul who wrote this greeting. It appears at the end of 1 Peter, “Greet one another with a kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ”.
In the Old Testament, there were occasions where a kiss was used in a similar context, such as in 1 Samuel 10:1, “Then Samuel took a flask of olive oil and poured it on Saul’s head and kissed him, saying, ‘Has not the Lord anointed you ruler over his inheritance?” In this case, it was in an act of reverence, as Samuel recognised God’s presence with the man before him. And we all remember the kiss that sealed Jesus’ fate when the soldiers came to the garden to arrest Him. Matthew 26:48-49, “Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: ‘The one I kiss is the man; arrest him.’ Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, ‘Greetings, Rabbi!’ and kissed him”. Why was the signal to be a kiss? In those days, it would have been a natural way to honour someone and to demonstrate brotherly love.
So today, we pilgrims reflect on how we greet one another and consider the “holy kiss” in an appropriate setting. It is not always acceptable to everyone, as in the case of a young man I knew who recoiled from human contact of any sort, because he was somewhere on the autistic spectrum. As an aside, though, it has been wonderful to see God at work in him, bringing healing that enabled him to gradually overcome his phobia.
In greeting someone there is an opportunity to share a common bond that centres in God. It may be with a hug, or a handshake, or even a “holy kiss”, but its inherent meaning is one of mutual love and respect. The early church considered such a greeting to be important, and today we would do well to emulate their sentiments and intentions in our modern churches and fellowships.
Dear Father God. With one mind we greet one another, knowing that we do so in Your name and to Your glory. You created families, and we are part of Yours through Jesus. Thank You. Amen.
Being a Pilgrim 